Internet Defends Mom Who Put Lock on 10-Year-Old's Bedroom Door - Fix Bdsthanhhoavn

Internet Defends Mom Who Put Lock on 10-Year-Old’s Bedroom Door

Members of a popular internet forum were quick to defend one mother’s decision to put a lock on her 10-year-old son’s bedroom door.

In a viral Reddit post published on r/AmITheA**hole, Redditor u/NewtGroundbreaking70 (otherwise referred to as the original poster, or OP) described her only son as “a quiet kid who likes his own space” and explained how her overwhelming nieces and nephews were the catalyst for greater privacy measures.

Titled, “[Am I the a**hole] for putting a lock on my son’s bedroom door?” the post has received nearly 7,000 votes and 1,200 comments in the last nine hours.

Writing that her older sister and her three kids live just down the street, the original poster said her extended family is around a lot and can be bothersome for her son.

“They always swarm to his room to play when they come [around],” OP wrote.

After a discussion with her husband, the original poster said the parents came to the mutual decision to install a lock on their son’s bedroom door, and told the boy he can use the lock to keep his cousins out of his space.

However, the first time her nieces and nephews discovered their cousin’s locked bedroom door, the original poster said it immediately caused problems with her sister.

“The kids swarmed to his room only to find the door was locked, at first they thought it was stuck and came to tell me…I told them that no it was locked and it was up to my son if he wanted to let them in,” OP wrote. “My sister was annoyed at me over this and told me that a 10 year old didn’t need that kind of privacy and I was just training him to be rude and inconsiderate.”

“I wasn’t going to point out in front of her kids that they were the reason he needed the lock in the first place,” OP continued. “I told my sister to lay off and if her kids needed to play so much there was no reason to hang around after lunch.”

“My sister did eventually leave in a huff…but has been telling our parents how rude I’ve been and how I’m teaching my son to be inconsiderate too and how I’m not teaching him to ‘share,'” OP added. “Our parents are taking my sister’s side…my husband is on my side and has suggested my sister and her kids not come [around] for a while.”

Although bedrooms are almost always accompanied by a bedroom door, some parents see the physical separator between themselves and their children as a tool of power and control.

While a closed door can help eliminate any outside noise from a sleeping child’s bedroom, older children often use the bedroom door for a different purpose: to keep themselves in, and their parents out.

In 2015, Care.com asked parents if a bedroom door is a right, or a privilege. Responses were mixed, with some parents advocating for a child’s right to privacy and others arguing that children have no need for privacy.

Other outlets, like Psychology Today and Professor’s House, have also addressed the issue of bedroom doors and across the board, one solution appears more frequently than all others: compromise.

“As long as there are channels of communication between the child and the parent, the room should be left to the care of the child,” the Psychology Today website reads. “Active dialogue and some degree of mutual accommodation is the answer.”

Opening bedroom door
Members of Reddit’s r/AmITheA**hole forum defended one mother’s decision to put a lock on her son’s bedroom door.
alice-photo/iStock / Getty Images Plus

In the case of the viral Reddit post, the original poster said there was, and continues to be, a high level of communication between her, her husband and their son. And no matter how much pressure her sister and other family members apply, the original poster assured that keeping her son comfortable and safe is their highest priority—something many Redditors could appreciate.

“[Not the a**hole],” Redditor u/km89 wrote in the post’s top comment, which has received more than 11,000 votes.

“As someone who grew up with very little privacy… thank you,” they added. “You’re doing right by your kid.”

Redditor u/Adventurous_Aide-456, whose comment has received more than 1,300 votes, speculated that the original poster’s sister insisting that her nephew appease her three children could be harmful in the future.

“That isn’t sharing, that is bullying,” they wrote. “Your sister is encouraging her kids to bully your son, which will only increase his social anxiety…what your sister is doing will only hurt your son and teach her children horrible manners.”

“Unlike your sister, you are teaching your son the only thing he is entitled to is his personal autonomy,” Redditor u/BrownSugarBare added. “Your sister is teaching her kids to get upset when they don’t get their way and demand things from people that owe them nothing.”

Newsweek reached out to u/NewtGroundbreaking70 for comment.

Tags: #Internet #Defends #Mom #Put #Lock #10YearOlds #Bedroom #Door

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